The biggest problem with resolutions is that they’re so negative,” observed Rikiat, a 43 year-old legal practitioners. “I will watch less TV” or “I will stop eating junk food” or “I work fewer hours.” While the root of these desires is perfectly worthy, the phrasing is all wrong. Telling yourself not to do something is not very motivational.
They are also vague. What does less TV mean? Why should we expect to transform everything about ourselves in one arbitrary day? Surely, if you wanted it enough, you would have started the day you decided it was a good idea. And if last year’s resolutions were so great, how come you can’t even remember what they were?
It’s the time of year, once again, for the dreaded resolutions that a lot of us don’t take seriously. We believe that we must make the New Year the best we have ever had. But, according to Rikiat, “The best attitude is to take New Year as a time for reflection rather than aggressive target-setting. Think about what you’ve achieved and what you hope for in the coming 12 months.
This is far more positive than the conventional New Year’s resolution fiasco. Think about the previous year and ask yourself three questions: What did you achieve that you were really proud of? What would you have liked to achieve but didn’t? What did you learn about yourself and other people? The next step is to look ahead then ask yourself what is going to be important in the coming year?
What aspect of your life are you going to focus on? Focusing is important. You can’t do everything all at once, but, perhaps, you want to prioritise your family in the New Year. Or maybe you want to put yourself first. Maybe, you want to concentrate on your job. Think about the different parts of your life and choose one or two that will be themes for the year ahead.
I’ve long stopped making resolutions. Not that they haven’t been helpful in the past, but because the things I resolved not to do paled into insignificance as the New Year unfolded and I was faced with bigger challenges. Yet, it is important that we all have some sort of blue print for the New Year. Susan Palmer, a psychologist, recommends creating some visionary statements as an alternative, “Don’t overdo it”, she warns, ‘but make sure they are positive. Some examples could be: in 2025, I will make sure that I take care of my needs. By taking care of my needs, I can be a better friend/husband/wife/father/daughter/sister/colleague.
Or, in 2025. I will raise at least, N1,000,000 for charity. You will see that the word ‘try’ does not appear in any of these statements and they are in the present tense. When you say, I will do this, your mind add ‘at some point.’ But when you say I am this, or I do that, your mind sees that you mean right now, starting from today. Now break these statements into practical steps. If you are going to treat your body like a temple, clarify what this means – exercising three times a week? Meditating daily? It’s up to you to interpret your visionary statements. Just make sure your goals don’t sound like you’re telling yourself off for being naughty in 2024. This just doesn’t work long term and is the main reason most resolutions don’t last as long as the Christmas turkey.
Finally, write your statements down and put them where you’ll see them regularly – on your pin board, by your bed, in your purse. That way, you’ll not only keep them at the forefront of your mind but at the end of the year, you will remember what they were.
Why Men Tolerate Pain Better
It is a debate that can prove rather agonising for everyone involved. Men have long claimed that their pain threshold is higher than women’s, while women cite child birth as a proof the opposite is true.
Now, scientists have claimed to have found the answer once and for all. It seems men can tolerate more pain than women and are less likely to let on that they are suffering because they want to appear macho.
According to researchers from Leeds Metropolitan University, gender stereotypes mean men tend to act stoically when they are hurt, whereas women show more sensitivity.
Pain scientist, Dr. Osama Tashani, who recruited 200 British and Libyan volunteers for the study said: “Traditionally, high levels of stoicism are associated with men and high levels of sensitivity are associated with women. Some ethnic groups are described as more stoic, while others are viewed as more free in expressing their pain behaviour. We did not detect differences in pain unpleasantness.”
Dr. Tashani monitored sensitivity, endurance and willingness to report pain, and found that men had higher pain thresholds and reported less pain intensity than women. Irrespective of their nationality. The British volunteers could not endure as much pain as Libyan participants but were more willing to report it.
Adeleke Damilola (ACTION) is a versatile content writer with expertise in news writing and a seasoned media professional and broadcast specialist. Currently serving as News Editor for DNews Info, Damilola is also the CEO of the ACTION brand, committed to shaping lives and establishing a legacy of excellence for present and future generations.
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